I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
Randomize
