remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
Is this like a preordered booty call?
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
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