He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
Randomize