I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
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