Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
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