Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize