One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
my shit smells like andre
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
After tacos, we're chasing women.
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
Randomize
