her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
My ATM looks so different sober.
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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