haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
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