Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
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