CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Randomize
