Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
what day is it and did you see me today?
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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