You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Randomize
