Cold hands, warm shart.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Randomize
