...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
so i texed my mom when i was trashed last night and said "i know its 3 am, just go to bed and i'll be back by the time we leave for the airport"
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
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There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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