Texts From Last Night

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  (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  My brain says no but my pants say off.

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  (902): My brain says no but my pants say off. http://tfl.nu/syce
  Replies (7) Good night (5087) Bad night (734)
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.

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  (203): I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now. http://tfl.nu/m857
  Replies (12) Good night (4507) Bad night (790)
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  (516): View more from New York

  im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test

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  (516): im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test http://tfl.nu/0qhc
  Replies (79) Good night (52802) Bad night (2281)
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  (520): View more from Arizona

  woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes

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  (520): woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes http://tfl.nu/cy36
  Replies (33) Good night (743) Bad night (9961)
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  (301): View more from Maryland

  Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"

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  (301): Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal" http://tfl.nu/5b46
  Replies (48) Good night (3993) Bad night (764)
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  (763): View more from Minnesota

  It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.

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  (763): It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo. http://tfl.nu/heh2
  Replies (22) Good night (7035) Bad night (1383)
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  (540): View more from Virginia

  She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.

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  (540): She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her. http://tfl.nu/1bms
  Replies (13) Good night (4794) Bad night (1405)
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  (212): View more from New York

  It's never good when you wake up covered with burns

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  (212): It's never good when you wake up covered with burns http://tfl.nu/8fkk
  Replies (15) Good night (727) Bad night (3941)
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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.

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  (978): I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it. http://tfl.nu/93wr
  Replies (6) Good night (2423) Bad night (946)
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  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.

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  (414): we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs. http://tfl.nu/5423
  Replies (6) Good night (3210) Bad night (871)
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  (518): View more from New York

  Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.

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  (518): Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat. http://tfl.nu/lwgj
  Replies (9) Good night (622) Bad night (3448)
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  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween

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  (403): I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween http://tfl.nu/vo8h
  Replies (4) Good night (2118) Bad night (591)
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  (281): View more from Texas

  So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.

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  (281): So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way. http://tfl.nu/y9oo
  Replies (5) Good night (526) Bad night (800)
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  (770): View more from Georgia

  I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick

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  (770): I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick http://tfl.nu/l70j
  Replies (3) Good night (859) Bad night (579)
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  (616): View more from Michigan

  I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time

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  (616): I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time http://tfl.nu/iio9
  Replies (1) Good night (672) Bad night (266)

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