no. you can't hotbox the world.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
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