your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
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