the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
