just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
Randomize
