Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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