i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
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