Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Randomize
