My key broke off while I was turning the key. I can't pull the broken key out. Not only am i locked outside, so is the rest of the building.
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
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