"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
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