does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
Randomize