Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize