Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
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