i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
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