every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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