I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
I currently don't understand fingers.
Randomize