But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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