No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize
