I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
Randomize
