I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
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