I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
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