how can u be prego again
Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
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