He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
The cabbie told me fat girls shouldn't wear tight clothes, and that he feels bad for the guys that have to be underneath them, especially because their positions are "very limited" and proceeded to ask me if I had a trash can and if I could throw something away for him. Don't worry though, he promised it wasn't anything "bad". He then handed me a tied up grocery bag with a bunch of wadded up Kleenex that weighed about 3 pounds. To answer your question, yes I made it home. Fml
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
