:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
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