please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
Randomize
