I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
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