This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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