So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
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