I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
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