I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
We smell like vodka and hangover
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize