Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
Randomize
