Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
Randomize
