I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
Princesses don't give blow jobs
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
That's the last time you call me to prove to some girl at a bar that you're English. It's bad enough that you actually get to fuck them because of it without having to wake me up to seal the deal.
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
Randomize
