You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
then he tried to convert me to islam
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Randomize