My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
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