Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
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