I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
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